you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Damn victory sex feels great
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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