just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The power of my boobs compel you
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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