She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
do nipples grow back?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
