Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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