You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
