You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
