i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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