I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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