A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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