so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
