she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
