You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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