I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
