Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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