So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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