No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
