Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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