I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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