I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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