you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
