Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
