I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
