"it" just moved
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
