I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
