i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
