It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
