yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
