I wish i was in the wii world.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
