i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
