Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
