Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
