I have demons in me.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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