Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
