so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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