I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
This beer is not sobering me up at all
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
