No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
