So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
