OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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