girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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