Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
How does it feel to date your dad?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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