so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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