You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
