I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
