carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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