Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
