She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
