If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
