My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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