at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I intend to get homeless drunk
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
