If that was your dad, he is hot
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
